regency au } { of returning friends and complicated emotions

[wildkingdom]

Liam: [it had been almost three years now since Liam had seen any of the Hales. His lord's knights were not big at tournaments, but they would go to the local ones within a day's ride when they had occasion. It had taken him almost a year to give up the idea that they would come to bring him back and forgive him. Another year to get over the anger and accept that his situation was of his own making. Once he had done that, his mindset finally changed and he accepted his place, which had helped a lot in his training. Seeing Lord Hale and his wife in the stands was a shock, though, and for a moment he wasn't sure he wanted to approach or he wanted to hide. But finally he just decided to ignore it, and went to work preparing the horse and lance for his lord to take as his turn approached in the joust.]

Peter: [looking over the field, and then he sees Liam and leans into Kate] If I'm not mistaken, that's young Liam over there with that horse.

Malia: [werewolf hearing can't hide that from his daughter, however, and her head picks up with a frown] What?

Peter: [motions with his head over to where the knight is now climbing up on the horse] That squire there.

Malia: [will then peer over curiously but say nothing for right now. she isn't sure if there's anything to say]

Liam: [and when his lord wins the joust round, he will take care of the horse and go to lead it back to the stable while the knight goes to celebrate with his team]

Malia: [and she will wait for her father to be distracted by lord business before slipping down to the stables to hang out with the horses]

Peter: [yeah, totally knows where you're going, daughter. He just won't stop you]

Liam: [and he will be taking off the armor from the horse and putting it back on the cart in it's spots before he stops, picking up the familiar scent and turning his head]

Malia: [and she'll just stand there, watching him and trying to see her friend in him]

Liam: [finally he shakes his head] I think we're a bit too old to play hide and seek, Malia.

Malia: I wasn't hiding.

Liam: No, but you weren't speaking either. You were lurking.

Malia: [eye roll] I couldn't tell if you were you.

Liam: [and he will turn to look at her and yup, he's all grown up now. Still growing too, but not the cute little puppy] Well, it's been a few years.

Malia: [just nods. she's a bit more reserved than the child she was, and she's done some growing of her own. she tends not to speak much though]

Liam: [he smiles at her a bit] You've gotten taller.

Malia: [that makes her smile a bit too] So have you.

Liam: I've still got a ways to go. My nickname is Runt.

Malia: [she laughs] Well, you always were tiny.

Liam: [tilts his head a bit] Thanks.

Malia: [oh. that's wrong. her face falls slightly before shaking her head] I'm sorry. I'm bad at this.

Liam: [smirks a bit] Well, you always were a bit blunt with your words.

Malia: [makes a face] Lady Caroline says I lack felicity of language.

Liam: What the hell does that even mean?

Malia: I don't speak well.

Liam: You sound just fine to me.

Malia: She doesn't believe society will feel the same way.

Liam: Probably not, but I don't really care all that much about society.

Malia: You don't have to.

Liam: Technically I'm supposed to. But I don't. Not like I'm going to be doing a lot of time with people there anymore.

Malia: Yes, well. I don't have a choice.

Liam: Well, you do but your father would probably lock you in a tower if you tried.

Malia: Tried what?

Liam: Run away.

Malia: [sighs] I have tried.

Liam: You did?

Malia: I didn't get very far.

Liam: When did you try?

Malia: After they made you leave.

Liam: [blinks, not expecting that] Why?

Malia: Because you were my friend. You were my only friend.

Liam: [he looked at his hands, and nodded] Well, it was my fault I was sent away, Malia. They were not to blame.

Malia: I know. But I still didn't want you to go.

Liam: I didn't want to go either.

Malia: Then why did you take from us?

Liam: Because I was an idiot and thought I would be able to get it back later.

Malia: So our love was an acceptable risk to you?

Liam: I didn't think of it like that then.

Malia: You just wanted the money.

Liam: I didn't really want the money either. [his hand went to the horse] It was the thrill of winning I wanted.

Malia: [and that hurts, because that's something intangible and it meant more to him than them. and that small, indignant part of her can't help what comes next] Then I'm glad you lost.

Liam: [he just nods, and then sighs] I should get back to caring for the horses.

Malia: [exhales and nods] I should find my father.

Liam: It was nice seeing you again.

Malia: You too. [though there's not much feeling behind it, as she turns to go back to her father, looking a little more dejected than she had when she left]

Hector: [when he is out of Liam's hearing distance, he will slip in beside her and bow] Lady Hale, good day.

Malia: [turns startled before nodding] Good day, Sir Hector.

Hector: I'm surprised to see you this far from your father's side.

Malia: I'm sure he knows where I am. [she has no delusions that Peter doesn't know her very well]

Hector: I'm sure he does. The draw of seeing an old friend is hard to resist.

Malia: It is. But that is done, and I was going. [please don't make her talk about this please please please]

Hector: I understand. [he bowed] Have a good rest of your day.

Malia: [there's relief there, nods] You too. [and then there's a beat before she remembers] Congratulations. On the win.

Hector: Thank you. We don't participate much, but it's nice to know I can keep up with them when I do show.

Malia: [she nods again, and she doesn't know what else to say so she just, starts to step away again]

Hector: [and he will let her go]

Peter: [is going to be waiting for her at their tents]

Malia: [and will make her way back in and just ... sit on the edge of her cot and not say a word.]

Peter: [goes in to see her, trying not to pry but] I take it you saw Liam?

Malia: [she looks down at her hands and nods]

Peter: [goes to sit next to her] What happened?

Malia: I asked him about why he left.

Peter: [nods] And?

Malia: How could winning a dumb game mean more than us?

Peter: [sighs, shifting to look at her] It's not the game that mattered. It was the feelings he got from it.

Malia: That's what he said! He said the thrill of winning was what he wanted, and for some reason that meant more than being part of our family. Or being my friend.

Peter: Yes. It's called addiction. It's a psychological disease.

Malia: [she doesn't say anything because she knows that if it's a disease, it's not something she can fight, but that doesn't make it hurt any less]

Peter: It doesn't mean he doesn't care about us, Malia. His brain isn't wired the way a normal person is.

Malia: [yeah, that doesn't make her feel better either]

Peter: [he reached over to rub her back gently] What's wrong?

Malia: He was my friend. He was my only friend.

Peter: [sighs, because that was more his failure than anyone else’s] He is still your friend, Malia. What he did was not intended to hurt any of us.

Malia: He stole from us! How was that not intended to hurt us?

Peter: The thing with an addiction is that you don't realize half of what you do and the ramification. You believe you can fix everything. He thought he would be able to get them back.

Malia: [but he didn't. he lost the game and he gambled things that were important to her father and important to Laura on the chance that he would be able to get more for herself. She understands what he's saying about addictions but that doesn't make her feel better.] It doesn't make it better.

Peter: No, it doesn't. but it doesn't mean we can't forgive him and still be friends to him.

Malia: [sighs] Well, I am not ready to forgive him yet.

Peter: He will be there when you are. If you are.

Malia: [she nods slowly] Do I have to go to the party?

Peter: I think it would be nice and you can make some new friends.

Malia: [sighs] Alright.

Peter: He won't be there anyway. Squires do not attend the feasts.

Malia: I know. I just don't usually like most people at these parties.

Peter: You never know. You may find someone new who feels the same way.

Malia: [she's not getting her hopes up. but she'll go if Peter wants her to]

Peter: [and he does want her too. She needs friends.]

Malia: [she will try. She will just take a deep breath and nod] I will get dressed.

Peter: Good. I will come get you when we are ready, sweetheart.

Malia: [she nods and will get up to go to her things and find something to wear]