canon au } Post S4 - of overdue talks and alpha fears

[cluelesspuppy]

[The next day in class, Scott passes Kira a note, asking if they could talk.]

Kira: [she glances at the note, then back at him, before nodding. She'll scribble back "where?" on the paper before passing it back to him]

Scott: [waits until her dad isn't looking, and then passes it back saying "take a walk on the preserve?"]

Kira: [she reads it over, before nodding again, crumpling the paper in her hand before her dad sees it. She'll meet him by his bike when school was over.]

Scott: [and he's waiting, nervously, but smiles when he sees her coming over] Hey.

Kira: [small smile in return, not as bright as her usual ones when it comes to him, but it's still there all the same] Hey.

Scott: You still good for a walk, or we could go somewhere else if you'd rather?

Kira: No, a walk is good.

Scott: [holds out the spare helmet to her] I'll get us a bit into the preserve first.

Kira: [nods as she takes the helmet, putting it on and climbing onto the bike behind him. Her arms slide around his waist tentatively, knowing she's going to have to hold on tighter once he starts the bike, but keeping a loose grip for now]

Scott: [and he heads off towards the preserve, and eventually stops the bike when they are on one of the lesser known trails that he and Stiles used to hike as kids. Once they are off and walking, he looks over at her] I wanted to talk to you about... well, you know. Mexico.

Kira: [she nods a bit, hands in the pockets of her jacket. Something like this is normally where she'd have the impulse to reach out and hold his hand, but for right now she's keeping her hands to herself] I know. I mean ... I didn't know, but I figured, anyway. It's kind of a huge thing to skip over talking about in favor of "How's your day?"

Scott: Yeah, I just... I've been trying to figure out how to talk with you about this and keep avoiding it and I just... I don't want to avoid it anymore because it means we're avoiding each other and I don't want us to be avoiding each other.

Kira: [she nods a bit at that] Neither do I.

Scott: [he bites his lip] I still don't know where to start though. So um... I think I should find out what you need to talk to me about first? I mean, I hurt you and I'm always going to hate knowing that I did that and I'm really sorry...

Kira: [she closes her eyes as she stops] I know. I know it wasn't all you and a lot of it was Kate controlling you. It's not that I don't trust you, Scott. I just ... it wasn't where I was expecting the attack to come from.

Scott: [he's confused, and it's obvious on his face] I don't know what you mean by that.

Kira: It's supposed to be us against them, right? I just ... I never thought that they would be turning us against each other which is stupid. Because why wouldn't they. But they took you away and not only did I not stop it, but I didn't even see it coming. [she looks down because it's this weird and messed up guilt for not being smarter, or faster or better at this.] You're a true alpha, Scott. If someone could do that to you, and I couldn't stop it, what's going to happen if it happens to me? What if I get used against you? [it opens up a whole well of questions that she hadn't wanted to consider] I spent this whole time trying to deal with an attacker who's always right in front of us. Objective. That's the bad guy. I wasn't expecting it to come from the side. [poor Kira only came in at the nogitsune. She wasn't there for Jackson or Kate and Peter 1.0. She's kind of reeling at the fact that the person doing the most damage was a friend - out of his control or not]

Scott: [he stops walking, then goes to take her hands in his] It us, but remember how the nogitsune used Stiles? You weren't here but you've heard about Jackson - he was Lydia's ex. Allison's grandfather used him against us. It happens. And it doesn't mean you're weak. I mean, it means more that the bond between people are so strong that they would be chosen to be weapons. But it's the same strength that helps stop it, you know?

Kira: [she nods a bit, letting her hand sit in his for a moment] I just don't want to be used against you.

Scott: I know. It sucks, trust me. I don't want anyone to use you against me either.

Kira: I guess we just have to ... figure out how to keep that from happening.

Scott: I think that's I guess why packs are important. We take care of each other to try and make sure it doesn't happen. And help save those who do.

Kira: [she nods a bit] Yeah. I guess you're right. [she then squeezes his hand gently]

Scott: [small smile back] I mean, all of you helped me get back. I would have been lost without all of you.

Kira: [smiles a bit at that] You think we would have left you behind?

Scott: No, but if you hadn't found Stiles when you did...

Kira: They would have figured it out. [takes another tentative step closer] It would have been okay.

Scott: Would they have? I mean, Peter knew. We know why it didn't stop him, but he didn't stop any of them.

Kira: They would have. [there's another step and she's pulling his arms to her] They're your pack. It might have taken a little time, but they would have.

Scott: [nods] I just wish I had been stronger so I wouldn't have hurt you. Lately... I don't know. I feel like I'm becoming more of a monster.

Kira: How do you mean?

Scott: I don't know. Just... ever since I've been an alpha, I've felt more and more lost and angry sometimes.

Kira: Have you talked to Derek about it? He's kind of your Mr. Miyagi with the whole alpha thing, right?

Scott: [shakes his head] I've talked to Deaton about it. But Derek's had a lot going lately I didn't want to bother him.

Kira: The whole turning into an actual wolf thing?

Scott: Well, that and his losing his powers before and now dealing with Peter trying to not be crazy anymore and... [he laughs a bit] Apparently his other sister that was dead is back too.

Kira: .... Are Hales just ... allergic to being dead or something?

Scott: [laughs] I don't know, but they seem to be good at it.

Kira: [shakes her head] I guess that's good news for Stiles and Dawn.

Scott: Yeah, pretty much. Jury's still out on if it's good for us. [regarding Peter mostly]

Kira: [she nods a bit, before sliding her arms around his waist and leaning into him, letting her head rest against his shoulder] Are you okay?

Scott: [that alone helps him a lot because he feels better with the affection] Kinda. I'm still worried about myself. But I also got a look inside of Peter's head and... that could be any one of us. Trapped in our own minds going crazy until you don't resemble the person you used to be.

Kira: [frowns a bit at that, closing her eyes] But it's not. It's not you.

Scott: [nods] Just keep reminding me of that?

Kira: [she nods as she tips her head up to kiss him] I will.

Scott: [his eyes open at the kiss, and then he just melts into her arms a bit in relief]

Kira: [she hums a bit when she feels him relax, before pulling back briefly] And you still owe me a date. It doesn't count if it gets crashed by Beserkers.

Scott: [chuckles, nodding] Yeah, I do. Though it's going to be hard trying to top the whole lightbulb thing.

Kira: [laughs] Don't worry about topping it. I just want time with you.

Scott: Me too. I really like being with you. [his arms tighten a bit around her more] Like, a lot.

Kira: [smiles a bit as she leans into his hold] Good. Because I like it a lot too.

Scott: So are we good now? I mean, if there's more you need to tell me, I'm here to listen.

Kira: No, we're good. I'm ... well, not completely good, but I'm better.

Scott: How can I help make you even more better?

Kira: [it's not really anything Scott can do, it's kitsune stuff that she needs to work through on her own - getting better control, learning to use her talents better so that she's not left as helpless, but she likes to make him feel useful, so she'll hum softly under her breath before pushing up on her toes to kiss him again] Maybe a little of that. But I'm not sure. You may have to do it a few times to make sure it's working.

Scott: [smiles] I can do that. [And he will cup her cheek, kissing her firmly]

Kira: [and they will probably descend into teenage makeouts for a while, because teenagers]

Scott: [totally. and they were very rudely interrupted the last time]

Kira: [yep, they've earned it, but it means we should probably fade on these two and hop to someone else]