regency au } { of uncomfortable feelings and upcoming nuptuials

[impetere]

Peter: [he ends up spending a good portion of his night unable to sleep - his own thoughts and nerves getting the better of him to keep him in that restlessness where sleep evades him. Finally, he gives up and goes to sit in his waiting room and staring off at the moon. It's a rare moment for him, and as he loses himself in thought, his fingers reach up to play with the wedding ring that still hangs on a string around his neck and normally hidden under all his clothes. But he sleeps in just a thin shirt, and it slipped out and into his fingers easily. Morning was going to come soon, and he would have to put the facade face back on, but for now, he was more himself than he let others see. Except his daughter, of course]

Cora: [her thoughts were spinning too much to let her sleep, so eventually she decides to get up and walk instead, wandering the halls until her mind quiets somehow. She doesn't realize she's walking past Peter's room until she's there and sees him standing at the window] Peter?

Peter: [snaps out of it a bit to look over at his niece, smiling softly] Unable to sleep?

Cora: [shakes her head as she makes her way closer]

Peter: [makes room for her on the window seat] It has been a very long and stressful day. I don't blame you for that.

Cora: [nods as she makes her way over to sit, keeping her eyes on the window]

Peter: [he reaches over to rub her back.] What is on your mind keeping you awake?

Cora: [no, she doesn't want to talk about that] I heard you're going to marry Kate Argent. [it's a lie, but it's a safer topic]

Peter: [snorts] I had a feeling Scott was listening in.

Cora: He said you agreed to it?

Peter: That I did. And she was the one who suggested it.

Cora: Are you sure this is a good idea?

Peter: The other options are not ones I would pursue. [he pulled her into him a bit] Your sister and brother are both happy. They are both in love. And if my marriage to Kate gives you the chance to marry for love as well... then I will feel as if I have finally been able to give you all what I have always desired to give you.

Cora: [her face falls a bit at that and she leans into the gesture, keeping her eyes on her hands in her lap] But if you two kill each other that will not exactly be conducive to peace.

Peter: For the jibes Kate and I throw at each other, we both see the greater good in this. We will survive each other.

Cora: I hope so.

Peter: I know so. Plus, it means you won't have to leave the manor.

Cora: [glances up and nods a bit, because that is what she wanted, but now she's got mixed feelings about it] Will you and Malia still be leaving?

Peter: We will be making home in the summer castle. Your sister will need to marry to take control of the manor from me, but once that is done... it is not as far as you think.

Cora: [there's a long pause] Are you still going to decide who marries me?

Peter: [he thinks for a moment, then shakes his head] No, it will not be me. Nor will it be Daniel, nor Parrish. I believe we are leaving that choice up to you now.

Cora: [blinks, her eyes widening] Me?

Peter: Yes. [he gave her a soft smile] Which means, my dear... you get to choose who you wish to marry. For love.

Cora: [and that doesn't make her feel any better either, and she's back to pensive silence]

Peter: I know it's not going to be easy. You spent your whole life expecting to marry for an alliance and now you don't have that security. You're going to have to learn to trust yourself to make the right decision.

Cora: What if I don't want it at all?

Peter: Then you better be prepared to be nurse to your sister's pups. [he kissed her cheek] But don't shut your heart to it if you feel it coming, Cora. Love can bring pain when lost, but even I would not have given up the love I had when I had it.

Cora: I don't know what I feel. [oh that's a little too specific, isn't it? She's too tired to realize it]

Peter: [chuckles, leaning back to let her lay against him. she was too big now to just fill his arms, but so many nights after her mother had passed, they would be in this position] Don't be scared of it. Just go with it, and see where the feelings take you, sweetheart.

Cora: [she's quiet for a moment, curling into him more] And what if I'm wrong and I lose my friend. [which is so much more important to her than love]

Peter: A true friend will never be lost, no matter what. That friendship is a bond nothing can break.

Cora: What if I don't want it and I hurt him.

Peter: Then he will understand. But if you find that you love him... you will have to make sure you will be okay with him loving another in your place.

Cora: [exhales and closes her eyes, making a face] I don't know.

Peter: What do you want to do, Cora?

Cora: I don't know.

Peter: Do you know enough to want to see?

Cora: [sighs softly] I don't know. [she's really feeling very blindsided by all of this, Peter, sorry for being useless]

Peter: [just holds her and kisses her head] One day you will.

Cora: [closes her eyes and curls into him, not wanting to worry about it right now]

Peter: [and he is going to just relax and with her warmth, lull him off eventually into a light sleep]

Cora: [she'll probably drift off as well, having at least gotten some of that off her chest]