new york wolves } { of burning buildings and ptsd

[killmypatience]

Stiles: [growling and pinning her] Laura, no. I'm going to overrule you on this one. You're staying here.

Laura: [she stares at him for a moment, glancing between him and the building that's up in smoke and her eyes are already tearing] I can't do this again, Stiles.

Stiles: I can't imagine what this is like right now for you, but you can't run in there and put your brother and sister through it again either. You need to trust the fire department. The NYPD. And your brother.

Laura: [she knows he's right and she knows that's why she gave him this job, but she still can't help resent him for it a little right now. She grits her teeth before looking down and nodding]

Stiles: Right now, you want to help someone, help Lanie and Jenny. They are just as scared, and Jenny's about to give birth. Focus on them.

Laura: [she swallows and nods before going to climb back in the ambulance to help Jenny which will mostly involve holding her hand to pull the pain]

Stiles: [and he's going to just take a deep breath, resting his head against the side of the ambulance until Derek and Kate come over with the cell phone and Ryan on the line]

Jenny: [and is generally a sobbing mess by the time this is over and Laura is not much better. She can't hear Espo on the line and it's making her more nervous]

Stiles: [biting his lips. God, what would Peter be doing right now? He heard Ryan's description, and when they fire chief comes over the with plans, he just peers over their shoulders because you know, cop kid, he wants to know everything]

Beckett: [and eventually they'll put two and two together about the building inspector and will go off to track them down with their guns and their badass lady cop-ness]

Derek: [and he will rush off with the information the second the badass ladies get it to the fire team while they arrest him]

Stiles: [goes over to stand guard at the ambulance. Jenny's in labor and delivering so not the best time to tell them the news.]

Ryan & Esposito: [and they are alive! and after hugging Beckett and Derek, Derek helps Ryan to the ambulance where he stumbles in to Jenny while Javi is leaning on Beckett]

Laura: [is pretty much just going to switch out with Ryan for Jenny and Sarah Grace and head right to Espo taking him off Beckett's hands and pulling him towards one of the other ambulances so that he can get checked out] Don't ever do that again.

Esposito: [holding her tightly, totally not moving a moment just to hold his girl, okay] It wasn't really the plan to begin with.

Laura: [closes her eyes and just leans into him, hating the fact that he smells of fire and smoke] I know. Don't do it again.

Esposito: I'll do my best not to. [coughs a bit] Want to hitchhike a ride to the hospital with me?

Laura: [she nods as she manhandles him into the ambulance because like hell she is leaving his side for a good long while]

Derek: [and once the ambulances go, turns to Stiles] I'll check in on her after I do the report. Go home, Cora's probably worried.

Stiles: [nods] Call if you need me.

Beckett: [moves to his side] I have to head back and do some paperwork. Need a ride?

Stiles: Nah, I can walk. Thanks though.

Derek: I'll take the lift.

Beckett: [nods to him with a small smile] Then let's go. [and she leads the way back to the car]

Derek: [and when they are in the car, he's going to just finally lean his head back and take a good, long deep breath. Because that was the first fire case he's actually allowed himself to go to, Kate, for obvious reasons, and there is a slew of repressed feelings trying to get through his adrenaline wall]

Beckett: [she figured as much which is why when she slides into the driver's seat she reaches over to take his hand and give it a small squeeze]

Derek: [takes a deep breath] Thanks. [squeezes back]

Beckett: You okay?

Derek: Not really. [look, being honest] Right now, getting away from the smell will help a lot.

Beckett: [she nods before giving his hand another squeeze and starting the car]

Derek: [and he's going to be silent, and he will let her hand go so she can drive, but he's going to just close his eyes and focus on relaxing until they get to the station]

Beckett: [and she will let him do that, not really saying anything until they're back at the precinct] The paperwork shouldn't take too long. Then we can go home.

Derek: I'm actually going to shower first. I need to get the scent off me. I'll come up and help once I'm done?

Beckett: Sounds good.

Derek: [and he's going to take a long, cool shower to get rid of all the smoke smell. He's not even going to keep the clothing, tossing them in the trash and grabbing a pair of sweats from his locker to change into before heading back up]

Beckett: [is finishing up her end of the paperwork as he gets up there, glancing up with a smile] All clean?

Derek: Yeah. I don't smell like smoke anymore.

Beckett: Good. I'm almost done.

Derek: [and he goes to sit across from he, picking up his stuff to start. He sits there a moment, then looks up at her] Would you be mad if I asked you to shower before we went home? [aka you smell like smoke too]

Beckett: [she glances up at him before shaking her head] No, not at all. I can do that as soon as I get this filed.

Derek: Thanks. [and he's going to just... focus on his paperwork. or try to. and then just get up to get a coffee because he can put that under his nose and smell it and get his head straight]

Beckett: [it doesn't take that long for her to file her paperwork and then she's downstairs to take a shower]

Derek: [and he's just finishing up the paperwork and sending it off to the file as well, and then going to finish his coffee]

Beckett: [and then she'll return, wet hair pulled up into a ponytail] Ready to go?

Derek: Yeah, yeah I'm done here. [he gets up and leaves the cup on his desk. he'll clean it in the morning]

Beckett: [nods as she turns to go with him to the car] My place or yours?

Derek: Yours. I think Laura is going to lock Espo in the apartment for the rest of his life after today.

Beckett: [she chuckles] I'm sure, at least for tonight, he won't mind.

Derek: No, he probably won't. Though I don't know if I want to be him in the morning.

Beckett: Is she really going to be that bad?

Derek: We lost our entire family to a house fire, remember? Reason I hate going around fire cases - and she had her boyfriend trapped in this one.

Beckett: Yeah, but he's fine.

Derek: Doesn’t mean her fears will instantly vanish.

Beckett: True.

Derek: I'm pretty sure if it had been you in that... I wouldn't nearly be this calm.

Beckett: [and she pauses the conversation until they get into the car] But it wasn't me. It was Espo and Ryan.

Derek: I know. And you're also not locked up in my room because of that. [there's a small smile]

Beckett: [she chuckles softly] You're that overprotective.

Derek: Over the people I love... yeah.

Beckett: What if I got hurt on the job in another way?

Derek: It'd come down to the scenario. I never said my urges were rational. Or predictable.

Beckett: Well, what if I got shot?

Derek: Random perp, I'd tell you to walk it off. [smirks, but no, he'd be hovering worried boyfriend] Someone hunting you down to hurt you with intent... probably a lot more overbearing. So let's just hope it doesn't happen.

Beckett: I can't promise that. I have a lot of enemies.

Derek: So do I. You've already seen how bad it can get on my end.

Beckett: You've seen mine too.

Derek: And seeing that we haven't quit the force and secluded ourselves on a tiny island... I think we can handle it. I know you can take care of yourself. It's not about that at all. It's just instincts for me.

Beckett: [she nods. she's still fairly new to all of this, so she's still trying to figure out what it all means]

Derek: [he leans back in his chair] But with fire, it's more. I talked with Sweets about how I can't work those kinds of cases, and he thinks that it's a PTSD trigger. I smell the fire, and it links back to that moment and triggers certain feelings in me.

Beckett: You managed to push through it today, though. That must have been a huge step.

Derek: Yeah... yeah it is. Though I'm pretty sure I'm not going to sleep well still.

Beckett: [glances over as she reaches for his hand, continuing to drive] If you don't, I'll help.

Derek: [he looked over at her a moment, and then just smiled and took her hand]

Beckett: [and eventually they get back to her apartment and head upstairs]

Derek: [and he's going to just go hang up his jacket and then look at her] You ready to sleep, or want to watch TV for a bit?

Beckett: [she shrugs] It's been a long day. I think no matter what we do, I'll probably fall asleep on you.

Derek: Then let's just go to bed so I don't have to wake you to get there later.

Beckett: [She nods and since she already changed into NYPD sweats she can just climb right into bed without changing]

Derek: [same, and he is going to curl around her a bit, keeping her close]

Beckett: [just curls back into him, closing her eyes and passing out not long after]

Derek: [and he's going to sleep as well, but as he predicted, he's going to have a bad night, dreaming of the fire in the exaggerated way his mind wants to think happened since he hadn't been there to see it. But this time he's an adult, and he can hear Kate's voice screaming from inside and he can't get at her]

Beckett: [she can't sense it the way he can but there's a light sleeper. When he starts to toss and turn she slowly wakes up, glancing over and shaking his shoulder gently] Derek.

Derek: [it will take her a moment and then he will wake up with a gasp, his eyes glowing blue in the dark a moment as his brain tried to catch up with him to where he was]

Beckett: [one hand moves up to brush against his face gently, drawing his gaze back to her] Hey. Hey, you're okay.

Derek: [it takes him a moment before he's looking at her, and then he realizes and his eyes shift back to normal] It was a dream?

Beckett: [she nods] Yeah, it was a dream.

Derek: [nods and leans his head back into the pillow, groaning as he reached up to rub his eyes] I had a feeling that was going to happen.

Beckett: How bad was it?

Derek: Seeing the fire. But you were in it this time.

Beckett: [her thumb brushes against his cheek gently] I wasn't. I'm right here.

Derek: I know. [he leans into her hand] I know.

Beckett: [she keeps that gentle touch, before leaning in to kiss him, providing even more of a reassurance]

Derek: [that helps a lot, and his hands will slowly snake around her, pulling her into him, closer as he kisses back]

Beckett: [she hums softly, curling into him gently]

Derek: [he will keep kissing her a bit longer before breaking for air] I love you, so much.

Beckett: I love you too.

Derek: I don't know what I'd do without you anymore.

Beckett: All goes well, you won't have to find out.

Derek: [he just looked at her a moment, and it was impulsive, but...] So what you do then if I asked you to marry me?

Beckett: [her eyes widen] Really?

Derek: [he smiled a bit] Yeah. I know I should probably do something fancy to ask but this... this just felt right.

Beckett: [she watches him for a moment, considering, before nodding] Yeah.

Derek: [he sits up a bit, taking her hand] So would you? Marry me?

Beckett: [she nods again, a wide smile crossing her face] Yeah.

Derek: [and he smiled back, cupping her face with his hands and just kissing her]

Beckett: [she kisses him back, her hands moving to his sides as she leans into him]

Derek: [and this is just going to dissolve into engagement sex]

Beckett: [yep, pretty much]

Derek: [and once they are sated, snuggle back up and no more bad dreams]

Beckett: [nope. no bad dreams and just a whole lot of happiness]