puppy love } { of frustrated moms and letting go

[impetere]

Ben: [and he will be VERY CAREFUL of Dad's ribs while he is laid up on the couch, sitting on the floor building with his LEGOS while talking to him about everything Aunt Laura has been teaching him]

Stiles: [is still on pain meds, but he listens very intently to his son, even if there are times he drifts off a bit]

Cora: [and she'll be settled in a chair or mostly spending time making sure that everyone has food and Stiles is taking his meds and, you know, worrying. As she do]

Stiles: [and he looks over at her] You can sit down and relax, Cora.

Cora: [blinks and shakes her head] I'm fine.

Stiles: You have that worried mom face going.

Cora: [her brow furrows] No I don't.

Stiles: Yes, you do and it's totally aimed at me. You don't have to worry, I'm not going to leave the couch.

Cora: Stiles, I'm fine. [and she sounds a bit frustrated at that so she's going to walk back into the kitchen and wash some dishes]

Ben: [looks up at Cora's frustrated tone] Oooo, you're in trouble.

Stiles: [sighs] Well, I'm already sleeping on the couch.

Cora: I can hear you. [she's a werewolf, remember?]

Ben & Stiles: We know.

Cora: [grrr. but she'll just turn on the water and go back to cleaning]

Stiles: [and he will just huff from the couch, because what he wants to do is go to her and put his hands around her and make her relax. But he can't]

Ben: [and he will see his dad frustrated and the smell in the house is not good] Why is everyone mad?

Cora: [stupid baby werewolf noses] No one's mad, Ben. It's fine.

Stiles: We're fine, kiddo.

Ben: No you're not. Mom's cleaning and she only cleans when she's frustrated during the day. And you both smell bad.

Cora: [sighs as she comes back into the living room] Sometimes adults get frustrated kiddo. For things they can't control.

Ben: But if you can't control it, why are you frustrated? Shouldn't you just fix it?

Cora: It's not that easy sometimes.

Ben: [and he will get up and go into the kitchen] Why not?

Cora: [she takes a deep breath and crouches down so that she's eye level with him] Because life is hard sometimes.

Ben: I know that.

Cora: Well, sometimes when life is hard, you can't always fix it right away.

Ben: Why not?

Cora: Because you don't have the answer yet.

Ben: And that's why you're mad at Dad? Because you don't know why you're worried?

Cora: No, I know why I'm worried. And I'm not mad at your dad. I'm just frustrated because I don't know how to help him get better.

Ben: Maybe that's not something for you to do.

Cora: Yeah. Maybe it's not. But it doesn't stop me from wanting to try.

Ben: [and he will bite his lip a moment, and then lean in to hug her] You're a good mama.

Cora: [hugs him back and pressing a kiss to his cheek] Thanks, bud.

Ben: Maybe you can help by telling Dad stories? Stories help me remember things from when I was little all the time.

Cora: Maybe. [she pulls back with a small smile] But right now, you've got a friend waiting for you over at Hayley's house.

Ben: [blinks] I do?

Cora: Yes. You told Hope you'd go to the movies with her, remember?

Ben: [smacks his forehead] That's right I forgot!

Cora: [smiles] Go get your shoes on and I'll walk you over.

Ben: Okay! [and he will run off to his room to go get them]

Stiles: [blinks as the child runs by] Did I miss something?

Cora: He has plans with Hope. I'm just gonna walk him over and I'll be right back.

Stiles: Okay. I'll just... stay here.

Cora: [nods] Do you want the remote for the TV?

Stiles: Yes, please.

Cora: [and she will pick it up to hand to him] I won't be long.

Stiles: I hope not. I may have to pee soon. [smirks]

Cora: [shakes her head] Don't worry. I won't leave you here to suffer.

Stiles: Well, it would just make a mess to clean up later.

Cora: Which I don't want to do.

Ben: [thundering down the stairs in his sneakers and hoodie] I'm ready!

Cora: Okay. [and she'll take his hand and off they'll go to the Marshall house]

Ben: [because yay movie time with Hope!]

Cora: [yes! But eventually she'll return to check on Stiles]

Stiles: [and he will have ended up drifting off to sleep because pain meds]

Cora: [and there's a small smile and she'll make her way over, brushing a hand against the top of his head before going back to what she was cleaning before]

Stiles: [and he will probably sleep for awhile, and then he'll have a dream about an old case and he will groan, shifting a bit as the scene unfolds in Paris with him and an infected shoulder...]

Cora: [and she'll get that distress smell before she makes her way back out to wake him] Stiles ...

Stiles: [and he will jump awake, his eyes looking around a moment trying to figure out where he was before he settled on her and let out the breath he was holding in relief]

Cora: You okay?

Stiles: Yeah, it was just a bad dream. Or a memory. I'm still trying to figure that out.

Cora: What happened?

Stiles: I was in Paris. I was sick. There was pain in my shoulder. I think I was shot and it was becoming infected. I thought I was dying.

Cora: [she nods] And you called me and I brought Hayley to come help you.

Stiles: I didn't get to that point. I was sitting on the floor crying, scared. Angry at myself.

Cora: Why?

Stiles: [he licked his lips, trying to probe at the dream/memory] Because I took a stupid risk. Because I knew better. Because I didn't want to die.

Cora: Well, you didn't.

Stiles: So it did happen.

Cora: It did. Though I can't guarantee what I wasn't there for.

Stiles: How do you even put up with me?

Cora: I love you. Though after that, I was quite angry with you. We weren't together then, and I didn't really know about what your job entailed.

Stiles: I don't blame you. I'd be angry at me. I was angry at me.

Cora: But we worked it out. And in the end, you chose me and Ben.

Stiles: Of course I did. I love you both.

Cora: [she nods with a small smile, before leaning in to kiss him] And we'll be okay.

Stiles: [kisses her back] Yeah. I mean, I'm not doing that job anymore. Never thought that being a normal, boring person was a good thing.

Cora: A boring life isn't a bad one. I would love to have a life that's a little more boring.

Stiles: Stick with me, and I'm sure we'll get there.

Cora: I hope so.

Stiles: So how long are we kidless?

Cora: A few more hours.

Stiles: Good. And you want to help me, right?

Cora: Of course.

Stiles: Then how about this? Tell me stories about things that have happened and make me find the details. That will help.

Cora: Okay. [and she will shift forward to curl up around him, letting her head rest against his shoulder] Where should we start?

Stiles: Well, the few days before the explosion are probably gone. So maybe something before that and work backwards?

Cora: [she nods and she will tell him nice stories about their quiet boring life in Mystic Falls]

Stiles: [and as she does that, the memories start to come back and he can remember choices that they made, and he can link back to things from DC about working at CONTROL]

Cora: [good. And she'll keep working backwards from there]

Stiles: [and if they keep going, he will be able to have a good overview of his personal life. He'd need Hayley to help fill in his old work life, but it may be better he not remember those secrets from those jobs]

Cora: [probably for the best]

Stiles: [and he will just grin] So I should still be angry at your sister, right?

Cora: [her eyebrows go up] If you really want to?

Stiles: I just don't feel angry. I mean, I know I should be, but I'm not.

Cora: If you don't then you don't have to be.

Stiles: I just feel.... content. Contrary to all the memories.

Cora: Good. I want you to be happy.

Stiles: Are you happy?

Cora: Of course I am. [as happy as she thinks she can be, anyway]

Stiles: Good. Because I really want us to be happy.

Cora: Me too. That's all I want. [because maybe if they're happy enough one day she'll actually believe it's true]

Stiles: So what can I do to make you really happy?

Cora: [she shifts a bit as she rolls over so she can look at him a little more] You do make me really happy.

Stiles: I know, but there's gotta be something. I mean, do you want me to stay home and help take care of Ben while you go to college?

Cora: I don't know if I could do college after so long of being gone.

Stiles: Of course you can. Heck, you and Ben can do homework together.

Cora: I don't know. Right now, all I know that I want is you and Ben.

Stiles: Well, you've got that.

Cora: Then I'm good. Really.

Stiles: And maybe one day, we could think about another little one? One I can be around for the whole time?

Cora: [she nods] I'd like that.

Stiles: Then I guess I have to behave and heal my ribs

Cora: And probably marry me too.

Stiles: Oh, I plan on doing that very soon. [grins]

Cora: Oh really?

Stiles: Yeah. I mean, we can't have the good people of Mystic Falls think we're not a normal family.

Cora: You haven't spent much time with the good people of Mystic Falls. Ben has two parents, that's already abnormal.

Stiles: I don't remember much about the town so. [shrugs]

Cora: [she laughs] Well, I'm not so worried about them. But I really do want to marry you.

Stiles: I really want to marry you too. [thinks] You wanted something small. Just you, me, Ben, and two witnesses... am I remembering it right?

Cora: [she nods, though that's not one hundred percent true. she does want family there, but she doesn't know how to get it yet. because she's stubborn and a little broken]

Stiles: You sure you won't regret not having your family there?

Cora: [she shrugs] It's more complicated than that.

Stiles: I know. Well, I think I know.

Cora: We'll figure it out.

Stiles: Maybe us being away like this will help make things start to repair with them and you?

Cora: Maybe. Derek and I tried, but I think I screwed it up again.

Stiles: [he screws up his face, trying to remember if he knows about this] Screwed it up?

Cora: We tried to talk about it and ... it's complicated.

Stiles: A lot of things seem to be complicated in our lives.

Cora: My relationship with my brother is one of them.

Stiles: What happened?

Cora: [there's a pause because she really doesn't want to explain this] He refused to listen to my mom and Peter about something and my mom died. And I know it's not like he set the house on fire but ... he should have known better.

Stiles: ... Allison.

Cora: I don't blame her. I know it seems like I am, but I honestly don't care about her either way.

Stiles: But…

Cora: No buts.

Stiles: Well, one. I mean, it’s the foundation of your problems.

Cora: It's not about her existing though, it's about what Derek did.

Stiles: But you don't let him forget it.

Cora: I don't even bring it up! I just can't trust him the way that I used to.

Stiles: Why not? Has he done more to make you not trust him?

Cora: Because when I do forgive him, that's when the other shoe's going to drop. [and it bursts out of her, frustrated, because that's really what it is, in the end]

Stiles: [sighs] Cora, come over here. [because he wants to snuggle her]

Cora: [hesitates for a moment, because she doesn't particularly want to, but at the same time she does so eventually she caves and goes to him]

Stiles: [and he will pull her into his arms, holding her as tightly as he can] Cora, baby I love you. But you do worry a lot. Which is good in some ways, but in others it keeps you in a state of fear of what might happen that you keep things at arm’s length. It's not healthy for you.

Cora: [she tucks her head into his shoulder because she knows] It's not just that a bad thing happened last time, Stiles. It was the worst thing.

Stiles: And it was almost a decade ago. I've done worse to you than he has, and you are here with me still. At least I'm sure I have.

Cora: No you haven't.

Stiles: Putting you and Ben in constant danger for the rest of our lives because I decided to deal with losing you by becoming an assassin?

Cora: My life was already in constant danger. I'm a werewolf. In the end, you chose us. You chose me.

Stiles: Not right away. I was afraid to let you back in because I didn't trust you.

Cora: And I don't blame you for that. After what happened, I wasn't looking to jump head first into things either.

Stiles: But the thing is, Cora... I let you back in. I was scared the moment I did that; something would happen with my job or a hunter and you'd back up and run again. This…what we have now couldn't happen until I took that leap of faith that it wouldn't happen again. [he rubs her back] It’s the same with Derek. You're keeping him so far from you that it hurts. If you don't just take that leap of faith, you're going to lose him and you know it will be on you really and not what he did one time a decade ago.

Cora: At least that's a hurt I know I can handle.

Stiles: Really? What about Ben, when he starts to understand pack dynamics more and he sees that distance. How will it affect him?

Cora: I'm not keeping Derek away from Ben.

Stiles: No, but Ben has an empathetic gift to him. He knows when you're hurting. You don't think he won't figure it out and stay away to make you happy?

Cora: No.

Stiles: I hope you're right.

Cora: It's just not that easy. He's my twin. Giving him that much trust again is ... it's too much.

Stiles: Is it really? What's wrong about it?

Cora: Because it's more than just trust it's ... [she doesn't really know how to explain it] I was his sister and then I wasn't.

Stiles: Cora... I don't think your twin brother would stop thinking of you as his sister.

Cora: No, but that's what it felt like. I felt like I knew him better than anyone, and then I didn't know him at all.

Stiles: Baby, you do know him better than anyone else. And I think you know that he hates himself for hurting you. And that all the distrust he feels from you hurts him every day. He hurt you once, but you haven't stopped hurting him since because you're afraid. I think it's time you forgive him and let it go.

Cora: [she's quiet for a long time before ...] I don't know how.

Stiles: You take that leap of faith.

Cora: How do I do that?

Stiles: You show him you trust him. You love him like the brother you miss.

Cora: [she's just gonna be quiet for a while because she just ... doesn't even know where to start]

Stiles: You've got time to figure it out.

Cora: I know.

Stiles: And I think you'll be a lot happier.

Cora: I am happy.

Stiles: I know, but you can be happier.

Cora: That doesn't sound possible.

Stiles: It is.

Cora: I'll have to take your word for it.

Stiles: Good. [and he will kiss the top of her head]

Cora: [curls into him and just tries to relax]

Stiles: [and he will snuggle more and probably drift back off to sleep]

Cora: [and she will close her eyes and do the same, because she feels safe, but before she does she tries just to take a breath and let all the stuff she keeps locked in her chest. it feels tight and it's hard, but it's just one breath as she tries to remember how all of that used to feel. How it felt not to worry about everything, and in the end it just turns into a quiet sob and she tucks her face against his shoulder again so as not to let it get too far]

Stiles: [and he will hear her and just pull her a bit closer to him, letting her know that he's there for her]

Cora: [and she'll just curl up and try to drift off, not ready to go there quite yet]

Stiles: [and eventually he will actually wake up and need to go pee]

Cora: [happy warm sleepy girlfriend, you might have to give her more than a little nudge to get her up]

Stiles: Cora... [nudges her] I need to get up.

Cora: [blinks as she picks her head up] Oh, sorry.

Stiles: No, I just... need to go to the bathroom.

Cora: [she nods and inches off him so he can go pee]

Stiles: [and he will slowly get to his feet and slowly make his way to the restroom. Because he's still sore]

Cora: [poor Stiles]

Stiles: [life of a hero]

Cora: [unfortunately]

Stiles: [and when he comes back, he will sigh] I hate this.

Cora: You're healing.

Stiles: I know. But I don't like being this stiff. I feel like I should be more flexible and athletic.

Cora: I guess you're a little out of shape.

Stiles: [sighs] When they clear me for it, I'm going to get back in shape.

Cora: [smirks a bit] So more pudginess?

Stiles: What do you mean pudgy? I'm not pudgy. Am I?

Cora: A little. But it's the good kind of pudgy.

Stiles: [he isn't sure what to think about that, but he will shrug his shoulders and move to rejoin her on the couch slowly]

Cora: [she smirks a bit as she shifts to face him] As much as I like the abs and the muscles, a little bit of pudge is much more comfortable for cuddling.

Stiles: Well, if I'm retired now, you'll probably get your wish.

Cora: I'm okay with that. [she shifts to curl up next to him] But I also like watching you work out, so in the end, it's up to you. I win either way.

Stiles: I'm feeling like such a piece of meat right now.

Cora: Are you complaining?

Stiles: No, not really. [smiles] You're the only one I would want to ogle me.

Cora: Well, I try whenever I have the chance.

Stiles: Um hmm.

Cora: And I'm sure you do the same for me.

Stiles: Of course I do.

Cora: Then we're even.

Stiles: I guess we are.

Cora: [smiles as she leans in to kiss him] I love you.

Stiles: [kisses her back] I love you too.

Cora: I probably should go pick Ben up soon.

Stiles: Yeah. Probably time for my next dose of pain killers.

Cora: [kisses him again as she gets up] I'll see you when we get back.

Stiles: I'll be waiting right here.

Cora: [and off she will go to pick up Ben]

Ben: [and omg mom the Avengers movie mom]

Cora: [she's glad he had a good time]

Ben: [yup. Hope is totally going to be Wanda and Ben is Spiderman]

Cora: [good choices]

Ben: [and he is full of hot dogs, popcorn, and soda]

Cora: [and she will release him into the house to wear himself out until it's time for bed]

Ben: [WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!]

Stiles: [sleeps through child-nado]

Cora: [lucky him]

Stiles: [hey, you get exploded and enjoy the pain meds]

Cora: [uh-huh]

Stiles: [but pain meds make for weird dreams]

Cora: [what kind of weird dreams?]

Stiles: [like trippy dreams of dancing elephants and heffalumps and woozles]

Cora: [okay dumbo, but eventually your girlfriend is going to come wake you up to take you to an actual bed]

Stiles: [and he will shift a bit] Who put the mittens on the kitten? [still out]

Cora: [laughs softly] Stiles.

Stiles: [and that's a moan between hmm and noooo]

Cora: Stiles, c'mon. Let's get you to bed.

Stiles: [and he will blink awake, looking up at her] What time is it?

Cora: Late. Ben's home and in bed. You missed the sugar rush.

Stiles: [groans as he tries to sit up] Lucky me.

Cora: [shifts to help him up] I thought you might want to sleep in an actual bed tonight.

Stiles: Depends on if it's your bed or not. [wiggles his eyebrows.]

Cora: What other bed would it be?

Stiles: [you have him there] Um... Ben's?

Cora: [shakes her head] His bed isn't big enough for both of you.

Stiles: Yeah, but he would try to make it.

Cora: He would. But we are going to a much bigger bed.

Stiles: Okay, I think I'm sold. [and he went to stand up slowly, trying not to wince]

Cora: [and she'll try to pull whatever pain she can to so that he can move a little more easily]

Stiles: [feels that and smiles at her] Thanks.

Cora: Anytime.

Stiles: [and he will let Cora help him too bed, sighing in relief once he was laying down again]

Cora: [and she will go change into her pjs before crawling in with him]

Stiles: I have a feeling lovemaking is still a long way off.

Cora: [she glances over with a raised eyebrow] You get to see me naked again when you can move from the bed to the couch without any help.

Stiles: That sounds like a challenge.

Cora: Don't overexert yourself.

Stiles: But it would be worth it.

Cora: Think of it more as an incentive to let yourself heal.

Stiles: [sighs] Can I have a peek at least? For incentive?

Cora: [shakes her head, as she shifts to curl into his shoulder] No.

Stiles: Not even a clothing malfunction?

Cora: Go to bed, Stiles.

Stiles: Meanie.

Cora: You've seen it enough. Use your imagination.

Stiles: But I don't remember it. I need the reminder. [yes, yes he's going to pull that card]

Cora: [turns to him and raises an eyebrow like really??]

Stiles: [and it's the most pathetic Stilinski pouting face ever]

Cora: [shakes her head] Go to sleep, Stiles.

Stiles: [and he will huff and settle down] Total meanie.

Cora: [shakes her head as she curls onto her side] Good night.

Stiles: [and he will snuggle up with her and fall asleep quickly]

Cora: [and she will smile softly and close her eyes to do the same]