puppy love } { of sabbaticals and running away

[impetere]

Derek: [and the next evening after Allison was on campus, Derek is going to show up at his sister's doorstep before Ben is due out of school and she would be going to work. He's disheveled, exhausted, and pretty much walking a thin line on keeping his emotions in check as he goes to knock on her door]

Cora: [and she'll go to open the door and her eyes widen in concern] Are you okay?

Derek: No, nowhere near okay. Can I come in?

Cora: Yeah, of course. [and she steps aside to let him in]

Derek: Do you have any coffee made? I really could use a cup.

Cora: No, but I'll make some. Sit.

Derek: [and he is going to sit at the kitchen counter, pressing his forehead against the cool top] Thanks

Cora: What happened to you?

Derek: I just can't take this damn city anymore.

Cora: [places the cup of coffee down in front of him] Elaborate.

Derek: [looks up at his sister as he takes the cup] Why did you tell Stiles to tell Allison to stay away from me?

Cora: [there's a caught face there, before she looks down at her hands] I thought it would be easier for you. You were doing better, I didn't want that to change.

Derek: Yeah, well I was, but that doesn't mean you take away my reunion with her. Do you know that because of that, Allison is afraid that her talking to me is going to affect you letting Stiles have his relationship with Ben?

Cora: [her eyes widen] I never said anything like that. And for the record I wasn't ordering her to - I just asked her.

Derek: Well the telephone game has altered that. But either way - you won. But it doesn't matter. I just don't really have the ability right now i care about any of it. All I know is that I love her, and she still cares about me, but I can't have her. I can't have the person who is all I've wanted for the last seven years. The person who is this hole in my soul I can't fill and I don't know what I'm supposed to do now. I thought if I waited long enough, if enough time passed maybe there would be a time we could come back together and I'd feel complete again. But now I just feel empty.

Cora: [she sighs for a moment, rubbing her eyes a bit, before making her way closer] Derek, it's not the end. She's not the end. I know it hurts now, but you'll find someone else.

Derek: And what if she was my mate, Cora? That's how it felt when I was with her. That's how I feel now. Mom never moved on after Dad. But she had us. What do I have? I have an uncle who hates the sight of me, and half the time I feel like I'm a disappointment to Laura because I don't want to really be around her new pack. I hide behind my books, and I use you and Ben as an excuse to prove I have a life.

Cora: Then if you don't like that, change it! [she sighs] Mom never moved on after Dad, but Dad didn't move on after her either. And do you think it was easy for me to leave Stiles behind when I did? I thought he might have been it for me too - but I moved on. You can do it too. And Peter being a dick is not on you.

Derek: [he just sighs] If I'm going to be able to…I need to get out of DC. Just for enough time to figure things out.

Cora: Okay. If you talk to Laura, I'm sure she'll let you go.

Derek: I'm going to talk to her, but it's not going to be her letting me go, Cora. I'm going no matter what. I just need to know if you'll be okay for me to just leave for a while.

Cora: Are you going to throw your phone in the bay on your way out?

Derek: No, I'll have it but I'm probably going to leave the country. I need distance from everything.

Cora: As long as I can reach you in some way, then I'll be fine. Ben is really warming up to Stiles, so he can probably take your babysitting night.

Derek: [nods] Alright.

Cora: I just want you to be okay.

Derek: I don't know if this will help, but staying here isn't an option right now.

Cora: Then go. I hope it does.

Derek: [he wraps his hands around the empty mug] though right now can I just stay here? I can't go back to my apartment right now.

Cora: Yeah, of course. Malia should be bringing Ben home soon.

Derek: [deep breaths] Maybe after she can go check and see if the two women I brought home last night have left my place.

Cora: ... Two?

Derek: Yeah. [looks at the inside of the mug] I think they were friends. I don't remember their names. Not sure I even asked.

Cora: ... Okay then.

Derek: Yeah, you don't have to say it. I know I fucked up.

Cora: [there's a slight look at that] You didn't fuck up. You just ... took rebound sex to a whole other level.

Derek: And I didn't even really enjoy it.

Cora: I'm sure you're a disappointment to your gender. [teasing, gently] But that doesn't surprise me.

Derek: The only good thing is that my professor has been telling me the last few weeks that I need to take some time off and remember what life is. I don't need to worry about the loss of money for taking a sabbatical mid-semester.

Cora: Good. And I agree with him.

Derek: I'll send Ben postcards.

Cora: He'll love that. And will probably insist you face time him on occasion.

Derek: I can do that. [he looks up at his sister] I've been a good brother to you, right?

Cora: [she watches him and her face softens for a moment] Yeah. You're the best.

Derek: [there are tears in his eyes that he rubs away] At least I can do something right still.

Cora: [she watches him for a moment, before moving closer and sliding her arms around his shoulders] I love you, big brother. [which she rarely ever acknowledges but right now it seems like he needs it]

Derek: [he laughs at that because now? you're going to go there now?] I love you too, Cora.

Cora: [hey, she got him to laugh, so that is a victory. but she's going to hold that hug until the door to the apartment bursts open and Ben and Malia make their grand entrance]

Derek: [crap, he needs to clean himself up before Ben sees him] Can I use your bathroom? [the master one, he means]

Cora: [she nods] Yeah, go. [and she'll head out to distract her son]

Malia: [squints] You're still here.

Derek: Yeah, that's my fault. [and he is going to slip into the back, not facing either of them. Not that Malia will miss the scents rolling off Derek as he escapes into the back bedroom]

Ben: [looks up at Cora] Why is Uncle Derek here?

Cora: Because he was having a bad day and needed to talk to his sister. Think you can cheer him up for me since I have to go to work?

Ben: Is he staying?

Cora: For a little bit, yeah.

Ben: Yes! And I don't have homework tonight!

Cora: Then you are the perfect man for the job. Have any ideas?

Ben: [thinks, biting his lip with his overbite] Basketball?

Cora: [her eyes widen] You are a genius. Why don't you go grab your ball for when he comes out?

Ben: [grins and goes running off to grab it]

Derek: [and he will come out after a moment, looking less disheveled and his face washed.]

Malia: [still squints at him] The whole walk of shame schtick is usually my thing. [she's not judging, but she is concerned]

Derek: Yeah, I know. And i need to ask you a favor to help move it along.

Malia: What do you need?

Derek: Can you go to my apartment and make sure there's no one there waiting for me?

Malia: Want me to kick them out if anyone is?

Derek: Yes, please.

Malia: You got it. Ben's taking you to play basketball.

Derek: [smiles] That actually sounds good.

Ben: I found the ball. [grins] I'm going to kick your butt Uncle Derek!

Cora: Yes you are. [grins as she crouches down to hug her son] I'll come and check on you on my break, okay?

Ben: [hugs Cora back] Okay. I love you Momma.

Cora: Love you too, kiddo. [and she kisses his cheek before heading downstairs because she is late for work]

Malia: Ben, I gotta run an errand, but I'll bring back dinner, okay? What do you want to eat?

Ben: Ummmmm, tacos!

Malia: You got it, dude. [and out the door she goes to investigate Derek's apartment and secretly hoping she gets to be a bouncer and kick people out]

Derek: [which she will, because they are still there, naked in his bed eating his food because they are hoping to surprise him when he gets back.

Meanwhile, he is going to just enjoy playing hoops with his nephew.]

Malia: [and there's a thin smirk] Hi, ladies. Time to go.

Girl 1: You're not Derek.

Malia: Nope. But he asked me to convey that while last night was fun, you gots to go.

Girl 2: You're serious? He's totally bailing on us?

Malia: Do I really need to repeat myself again?

Girl 1: Who the hell are you anyway? [laughs]

Girl 2: Yeah, tell Derek to come back.

Malia: I'm Malia. And he's not coming back. So you have two choices. You can get up, get dressed, and go on your way, or you can continue to not listen to me, and I will haul your naked asses up and forcibly remove you right onto the grad housing lawn where I'm pretty sure at least one of your TA's might spot you. Maybe even a professor.

Girls: [and they will grumble, and almost look like they are about to challenge her, but then they think better of it and get dressed and leave]

Malia: [boo hiss. Malia does love boss people around. but she'll paste on a thin smile and walk them to the door.] Pleasure doing business with you.

Girl 1: Bitch. [and will flip her off before they go. There will be some undergrad rumors about Derek floating around campus by the evening]

Malia: [and she will just get a pleasant smile and fuck them basically. but she will pull out her phone and text Derek that his apartment is clear and she's on her way back with tacos]

Derek: [and she will have his undying gratitude as he's helping Ben dunk the ball]

Malia: [What are cousins with violent inclinations for? And around dinner time Malia will reappear with a paper bag in hand] Dinner's here!

Ben: [and he will finish his dunk and hold onto the net] Tacos!!!!

Malia: I said they would be.

Ben: [and he will let go, Derek catching him on the way down. They will head over to the picnic table just outside of the basketball court]

Derek: Thanks again Malia.

Malia: It was my pleasure. But I've seen them around and they may be saying some not so nice things about you.

Derek: Doesn't matter. I'm going to take a sabbatical from campus for a while.

Ben: What's a sab at a call?

Malia: A really long vacation.

Ben: Are you going away?

Derek: I think so, just for a few weeks. I haven't taken a vacation in a long time.

Ben: Weeks? [pout]

Malia: [she's not sure she's fond of weeks either, but Derek's gotta do what Derek's gotta do] He'll be back though. Right?

Derek: Oh yeah. Can't stay away from you guys too long. And I'll have my phone and call and maybe even send you postcards.

Ben: Ooo, I like postcards!

Malia: Postcards are pretty cool.

Derek: So where do you think I should go?

Ben: [thinks] New Jersey!

Malia: [laughs] I think you are the only person in the world who wants to go to New Jersey, Ben.

Ben: Really?

Derek: Yes, really.

Malia: Most people make fun of it.

Derek: But if you want to go to Jersey one day, Ben, you can go. Atlantic City would be fun.

Malia: And there's a beach. And Six Flags.

Ben: But the rest of Jersey sucks?

Derek: Pretty much.

Malia: Most people only think of it as a thing they have to go through to get to New York. And it kinda smells.

Ben: Ew.

Derek: But I was thinking about going out of the country. Somewhere different.

Ben: ... Disneyland?

Malia: I think he's thinking like England.

Ben: Disneyland is funner.

Derek: Funner isn't a word.

Ben: Yes it is.

Malia: It's close to a word.

Ben: It's a word. My teacher used it first.

Derek: Your teacher?

Malia: I think we need context.

Ben: She said that people use the word funner to mean more fun.

Malia: Yeah, but I think she meant it as an example of things you shouldn't say.

Ben: But I like the word.

Derek: I know you do, but it doesn't mean it's right.

Malia: Unfortunately some people are jerks about grammar.

Ben: You guys are no fun sometimes.

Derek: [ruffles Ben's hair. He looks at the tacos and hesitates a moment, but no, he's going to move on, so he will grab one to eat] England isn't a bad idea, but do I really want to be the American Werewolf in London?

Malia: Better than being the American Werewolf in Paris.

Derek: True.

Ben: You could go to Poland. That's where Dad's family is from.

Malia: Isn't Poland kind of depressing?

Derek: I'm not sure. Never been there.

Malia: [she shrugs] It's ... [then she glances at Ben, and changes her phrasing] ... got all that World War II stuff. [she is not explaining concentration camps to a six year-old]

Derek: True. [he thinks] Italy may be nice.

Ben: Where pizza is from!

Malia: And Italy has art!

Ben: And pasghetti!

Malia: And the pope?

Derek: It does have a lot of interesting things. And if I don't like it, I can always go somewhere else. Not like money is an issue.

Malia: Or that things are very far.

Derek: [nods] Then I'll start there, and see where things take me.

Ben: Can you bring me home a pizza from Italy?

Derek: It wouldn't taste good by that point, buddy.

Malia: Yeah, pizza doesn't travel well on a plane.

Derek: But I'll find something good for you as a souvenir, alright?

Ben: Okay. [and he's going to reach for another taco]

Malia: Have you told Peter and Laura yet?

Derek: No, I'm going to go over there tomorrow and tell Laura.

Malia: [she nods] Think she'll be mad?

Derek: Maybe. But I think she'll understand I need it.

Malia: [she nods] I hope so.

Derek: It's not going to stop me from going though. I need a break, and I need to get away from here.

Ben: Why? Don't you like it here with us?

Derek: Of course I do, Benny. Just... lately a lot of things are making me not happy and I need to go figure out how to be happy again.

Malia: Have you ever been so mad at your mom that you just want to hide in your room and not talk to her for a while?

Ben: Yes.

Malia: That's how Derek feels right now, except not just at one person.

Ben: but usually when I'm mad at Mom, we sit and talk and then she hugs me. How can you do that if you're not mad at someone?

Malia: [she shrugs] Everyone had different ways of dealing with it. I usually break stuff. Uncle Derek needs to take a little break.

Ben: But you will be back before my birthday, right?

Derek: I'll be back for Christmas. I won't miss that. We'll see how I feel at that point, ok?

Ben: Okay.

Malia: Don't worry, kiddo. He's not leaving for good. [a beat] Does Cora know who's going to take over Thursdays? [please don't say it's her, please don't say it's her, please don't say it's her]

Derek: She was actually going to talk to Stiles.

Ben: Dad?

Derek: Yeah. You think you're ready to spend the afternoon with your dad without Mom around?

Ben: Yeah!

Malia: [oh good] Sounds like fun!

Ben: As long as Dad's work doesn’t make him go away again.

Malia: Business trips aren't bad things, Ben.

Ben: But we were playing chess when he had to leave.

Derek: Sometimes bosses can be mean. You wouldn't want your dad to lose his job, right?

Ben: No, I don't.

Malia: The longer he works there, the less business trips he'll have to go on. Probably.

Ben: You think so?

Malia: Yeah. He can send other people on them instead.

Ben: And then have more time with me. [grins]

Malia: [she laughs] That's the idea.

Derek: You just have to give him time to get his boss to get used to him being a dad now. They'll get there.

Ben: Okay.

Malia: [and as they finish off the tacos] So. What's next on the agenda?

Derek: I need to go home and get my stuff to head back to school and talk to my boss. Let him know I'm taking the sabbatical and getting him to sign the paperwork I need. Then tomorrow I'll do the paperwork with admissions, go talk to Laura, and figure out any visas or paperwork I need to fill out.

Ben: You'll say goodbye before you go, right?

Derek: Of course!

Malia: So I guess that means it's just you and me, kiddo.

Ben: Lilo and Stitch?

Malia: Sounds perfect. [and off they go to watch a movie and probably snuggle]

Derek: [and he will go off and do all the stuff he said he was going to do, and will end up driving up to his sister's place after, spending some time with his dad talking privately since Peter isn't there at the moment]

Laura: [comes in smelling like food, as per usual, with Raph not far behind her] Anybody home?

Thomas: We're in here.

Derek: [and look, it's the rare appearance of the baby brother, Laura. And he's dressed in jeans and a t-shirt, not his school clothes]

Laura: Derek! [and she is pleased to see him, because she rarely gets to] You hungry? We've got some pretty good leftovers from the truck.

Derek: No thanks. I ate on my way out here.

Thomas; I'm going to go help Raph bring in the leftovers to the storage fridges. Leave you two alone. [he will squeeze Derek's shoulder as he heads out]

Laura: [watches as her dad moves past her, before closing the door behind him] That seems ominous.

Derek: Stiles isn't the only person from Beacon Hills in town.

Laura: I figured as much. Where Stiles goes Scott usually follows, and Cora told me about Lydia.

Derek: Allison is here.

Laura: Oh. [to be fair, unlike their sister, Laura doesn't seem threatened by that. But she doesn't exactly know what to say, either.] Did you see her?

Derek: Yeah. [deep breath] And because of that, I'm leaving town for a few months. I can't stay here.

Laura: I'm taking that this is because you two had an extended conversation and this isn't just a gross overreaction to her general presence? [she's not judging, she just wants to be clear]

Derek: Yes, and probably that too but I don't care how it looks. I just need space.

Laura: [shakes her head] No, that's fine. You deal however you need to deal. Just call me at least once a week so I can hear your voice and make sure you're still alive, okay?

Derek: I will. I'm also going to call Cora and send Ben postcards. I'm not cutting off communication so call me whenever you want to check on me. Just be sensitive to the time zone shift.

Laura: I will do my best, so long as you let me know what time zone you're in.

Derek: It'll start in Italy, and I'll let you know if I move from there.

Laura: Suona bene.

Derek: Thanks for understanding.

Laura: Of course. The only person I think needs a vacation more than you is Cora.

Derek: Maybe if Stiles gets the hang of parenting, she'll be able to take one and leave Ben with him.

Laura: Maybe. But I'm not holding my breath because that will also involve Cora being willing to part with him for that long.

Derek: Yeah. I'll try and work on her when I get back.

Laura: [she nods] Just take your time, okay? You'll figure it out.

Derek: I hope so. Do me a favor and check on my apartment every now and then and make sure no squatters have moved in?

Laura: Does Landon count as a squatter?

Derek: [laughs] No. In fact, if Malia and Landon want to live there while I'm gone, Malia's got a set of keys. Just make sure they bring their own sheets and towels.

Laura: [she nods] You got it. Because I'm ninety percent sure at least one of them will take you up on that.

Derek: It's not like I don't own the place. Just tell Malia she needs to pay for any damages they do.

Laura: I will.

Derek: Thanks for understanding.

Laura: Of course. I want you to be okay.

Derek: So do I. Fingers crossed. [and he is going to slip his hands into his pockets and go to head out]

Laura: [and she will head back to the kitchen to finish putting things away and will probably wind up breaking this to Peter]

Peter: [because who knows what he does during the days as he's an angry asshole in my head right now in this verse. But he will come back in around 4 out of habit]

Laura: [and he can probably pick up on the fact that Derek was there, but Laura won't bring it up right away] Hungry?

Peter: Depends on what you are making. [and he is going to find where Thomas stashed the newspaper and go about reading at the table]

Laura: Leftovers from the truck. [she peers at the carrying case she just opened] This looks like tomato soup and I can make grilled cheese to go with it.

Peter: No thank you, then. But I appreciate it.

Laura: Suit yourself. [and she'll go about fixing dinner for herself]

Peter: [and after a moment] So why was Derek here? It's rare he comes out to visit when you don't all but order him out this way.

Laura: He's taking a sabbatical and doing some traveling. He was keeping me in the loop.

Peter: [looks up from the paper] Your brother is leaving school? That is very unlike him.

Laura: Some stuff happened and he needed some distance. I've been trying to get him to relax for seven years, so I'm not questioning it.

Peter: [and there his a little humph noise because he has a feeling this isn't something he is going to like, but he will just look at his paper instead]


Laura: [AHAHA no she is not telling him about Allison. she's smarter than that] Anyway, he's going to be gone for a few months, starting in Italy and doing some wandering. He'll call to check in though.

Peter: [he actually already knows. He totally didn't follow Stiles home one night to see where the father of his great nephew was living] I'm sure that's a better scenario than dealing with his problems here.

Laura: [Well, she's not telling him that Allison is the source of Derek's aforementioned issues. It's better if her name is just not mentioned at all. Also that is CREEPY Peter] What dealing was he doing exactly?

Peter: [no one questions the people who do the dirty work as long as the results end in their favor] I'm sure that was a discussion you already had with him.

Laura: [sighs heavily] Look. Being here isn't doing him any favors. He buries himself in work and helping Cora with Ben and doesn't deal with the real problem in all of this which is himself. Probably because he subconsciously thinks that if he expresses an emotion that might fall on the spectrum of happy, you'll sense it, show up out of thin air and find a way to steal it from him out of spite. So maybe going away is a way to deal with things.

Peter: I'm not saying that it's a bad idea. All young men should have the opportunity to explore the world.

Laura: Then you could try being a little less snide about it. [she's just saying. and she'll turn around to keep fixing her grilled cheese]

Peter: You're the one putting adjectives to words, Laura. I'm factual, that's all.

Laura: [deep breath because she knows your tone Peter, and you can say a lot without actually saying anything] So what were you up to today?

Peter: Not much.

Laura: [noncommittal hum as she takes her food and goes to sit across from him, dunking her sandwich in her soup] Was it fun at least?

Peter: Not really.

Laura: I know most people say this to the generation above them, but you need a life.

Peter: I have one, thank you.

Laura: One that you never talk about and according to you isn't that fun.

Peter: And yet its the one i choose to lead. [turns page]

Laura: [just ... sighs. you are impossible]

Peter: [and he is so not going to tell Laura that he is working with a network of wolves to take out dangerous hunters across the country. Nope.] How was your day?

Laura: Good. Fed lots of people. Tried out a new plate that seemed to go over well.

Peter: What one was this?

Laura: Broccoli pene vodka with garlic bread.

Peter: Sounds nice. I would have eaten that if you had offered it to me. [small smirk]

Laura: Well, I would have, but there wasn't any left.

Peter: Then it sold very well.

Laura: It did. I will probably make it again.

Peter: Good.

Laura: I'll try and save you some next time.

Peter: Good. [and he will look at his phone as it starts buzzing] I have to take this. [and he will go outside to take it, speaking softly]

Laura: [and she will totally be sneaky and see if she can find a place where she can hear what's going on]

Peter: [not like he's going to say aloud the real things they are talking about. It's mostly talk about scheduling the next game and the opposing team stats]

Laura: [squinting. sooooo much squinting.]

Peter: [and he will finish with his call and go back inside]

Laura: [her eyebrows go up] Plans with friends?

Peter: Game plan for tomorrow.

Laura: Okay. Have fun.

Peter: [nods] For now, though, I'm going to head upstairs to take a shower.

Laura: Okay. I'll be in the TV room.